Jokes

A Swiss Joke

A Swiss guy, looking for directions, pulls up at a bus stop where two Englishmen are waiting. "Entschuldigung, können Sie Deutsch sprechen?" He asks. The two Englishmen just stare at him. "Excusez-moi, parlez-vous français?" The two continue to stare. "Parlate italiano?" No response. "Hablan Ustedes espagnol?" Still nothing. The Swiss guy drives off, extremely disgusted.

The first Englishman turns to the second and says: "Y'know, maybe we should learn a foreign language…"

"Why?" says the other, "that bloke knew four languages, and it didn't do him any good."

Joke for English/Korean Bilinguals:
Korea has one official language (Korean), but there are various regional accents/dialects. The Pusan accent is particularly interesting.  All Koreans are familial with the Pusan dialect, but if you are not Korean (and don't speak Korean), you'll need to know the following lexical items:
Watdae means: "It has come."
Muondae means: "What are you talking about?"
Beoseudae means: "It's the bus."

Joke: One day a Korean lady was standing next to a Foreigner at a bus stop in Pusan, Korea.  They were both waiting for the bus. Suddenly the Korean lady shouts, "Watdae!" and looks at the foreigner.  The foreigner, thinking she was speaking English to him, answers, "Monday!  "The Korean Lady hearing this, replies, "Beoseudae"  Of course the foreigner still thinks she is speaking English, so he says, "Happy Birthday!"

A lecture about English
A linguistics professor was lecturing to his English class one day. "In English," he said, "A double negative forms a positive. In some languages, though, such as Russian, a double negative is still a negative. However, there is no language wherein a double positive can form a negative."
A voice from the back of the room piped up, "Yeah, right."